Brain & Stacey get a sponsor ( for real this time ) talk about love languages, salsa dancing and one way tickets to Europe.
Brain & Stacey get a sponsor ( for real this time ) talk about love languages, salsa dancing and one way tickets to Europe.
Are
Unknown:you ready? I'm ready
Brian Upton:anytime you're ready,
Stacey Upton:I'm ready. Welcome to the broken tiles podcast
Unknown:you time that are nice. Thank you.
Brian Upton:I think we were talking about switching, but I don't know.
Unknown:I was pretty good.
Stacey Upton:Switching the song or switching how we do this now who gets the privilege of announcing the show? I see trying to find equity. Well, there's lots of ways to find equity. Don't ruin the next question.
Unknown:Have you peeked at the next questions? I have. Do you think this is an abuse of the Fair Use Act for the music yet? Are we on the edge? I think it's time to transition out of the sun. Okay. I'll wind it down. And let's see if I can bring this in. I promised to do something. Thank you. Thank you can't say the audience is too loud. It's very loud. Tell them to be a little quieter. They did a little bit much more bright than last week. Yes, that was much more subtle. Honey. So here we are again. And we have I think some big news coming. So exciting. Yeah, I think it's a I don't know if we want to do it now. Or build it up a tiny bit. We'll do it on the front part of this whole thing, but maybe not right out of the gate. Okay. All right. So should we talk a little bit mentioned again, where are questions come from? And then go into depth a bit later? Is that what your thoughts do that? That's perfect way to do it. So go ahead. So I will be reading questions from this fabulous game from a company called intelligent change. And we're going to share more about intelligent change in a little bit. But we're going to jump right into our questions. We are Yeah, we're getting right after it. I want to do one little from the last episode, the one thing we talked about that really struck me was we talked about, I think it was our last question where we talked about transition and in in becoming I think what we were Yes. And it made me think the next time I was driving around about one of our favorite comedians, not for everybody. Maria Bamford. Yes. But it made me think about one little bit that she did. And I think under our new kind of rules that we're using, we can play this and I'll be able to, it's just a couple minute clip. And I think it ties in really nicely to what we were talking about as far as the place you're at in your life and kind of qualifying like who am I? Where am I going in this little bit? I think you'll be familiar but it'll be new for the audience. See if we can get this to play. Turn it up Have you ever looked around your life and thought oh this isn't temporary. This may in fact be who I am. I I like to think of myself as a sophisticate. I get the New York Times and they're 10 free articles a month. But it's also true that I was recently on a Southwest Airlines Flight middle seat I just trembled spilled my diet coke all over myself my two new friends and I looked down and I was wearing an outfit that I purchased entirely earlier that day at a San Antonio Texas CVS welcome horns t as tech print poly legging open toe shower shoe. I like to think that's a one off but that's going to happen again I enjoy last minute fashion binge at a regional drugstore they kept those little crinkle shirts that gets open Their doll size you know, you have your publicized version of yourself on Instagram. I don't know what yours faces like on Instagram, but God do i laugh i am laughing if I'm not laughing if I'm not laughing and I laugh I'm laughing I'm outside. Okay. Yay. I'm not laughing outside. I'm with friends and family. Friends apparently the to him presumably. But while I'm looking at those pictures, I'm kind of trying to make them move but the won't work. Because the lay of the stretch. Almond dust is so thick so that's Maria. Again. That was the show. Do you remember the name of it? What do we decide lady dynamite is a show on Netflix. You want to check that out? I think it's again, I think she's one that she's delightfully cringy and so lovable. Yeah. And if you want to have a, an unofficial mascot of the broken tiles podcast, I don't know if there's anybody self admittedly more broken than Maria Bamford. I think her the name of her album, is weakness is the brand is the name of her album. So, but that just made me think about, you know, our conversations last week, and kind of where we left off. And I think, you know, me, I really enjoy humor as a way out of difficult spots. And so, you know, rely sometimes on things like that to kind of, you know, find a different angle for perspective. Right? Yeah. And so, I think we'll do that every once in awhile fears when you kind of come up with or I think of it, we can throw in that's a little bit of an icebreaker to something we maybe are going to be talking about that one led to another episode that I think would be really fun is the last part of that bit was about the way we present ourselves on social media. And it was that was really a cutting kind of piece of with friends laughing We don't show the ugly little bits in between. We don't post that. Right. Okay, so to take over do your thing. I think before we get started, I don't know if we did this last week properly. You know, on one level is of course, we're you know, you're not giving advice on the show, we're not, you know, anything qualified that way, like doctors, but you do have some qualifications that I think we mentioned as a joke at the beginning, I realized that you were a facilitator, and Haha, you were going to kind of lead this, but maybe tell a little bit about what you do, what your credentials are, and kind of what your weekdays are like, as far as facilitating? Well, I'm a social worker, I have a degree in social work, but I'm not working as a social worker. I am actually a health educator, but the area I specialize in is behavior change, and supporting people on their lifestyle behavior change journey. And I do that on, you know, I have done that in the past with, you know, one on one type of situations. But currently, I'm mostly doing this via group discussions, I call them group coaching sessions. And so I facilitate a conversation and share some evidence based tools and tricks in the realm of behavior change, right? And I think in a way, that's especially where you've gone with your education in your career the last 12 years now, between school and some of the things that you've done with with education, because you're, you'll be 52 And I think he started back at 40 as far as but you know, what's interesting is when I reviewed my resume, I've actually been doing this kind of work for over 20 years, when I started at the YMCA as a ready to be fit. What was my title? Ready to be fit coordinator was your actual full title. So I was doing work similar to what I'm doing now. But my knowledge base was very different. Right? Yeah. So it's, it's a it's work I really love and I think I've always loved it and I it's interesting to look back on it and see, you know, what, what I've done right? And I think some of the Your some of your homework. And some of the classes you were taking and or situations you've been in have become part of the way we administrate our conversations. Oh, gosh, we have grown so much based on what I learned in school. I would just apply it to everything. It was kind of amazing. It was like, my own lab, right was my home life, our home life, and also what I was doing, as I was working, I applied everything I learned in both of those worlds. And I just kind of feel like I was able to grow exponentially because of that. Right? I learned so much. Yeah. All right. I gotta find my bumper music. I forget which one it is. I think I don't think it's this one. It is. So we ready? Are we ready to officially jump into? Let's get closer? Let's get closer. Intelligent change. Intelligent change? That's a little peek into our surprise. Okay, hold on. I got that volume up a little bit, too. Yeah, it is pretty loud. Okay, so we're starting with the close card. And this is green. What something we should do together? And why something we should do together? And why not uncommon conversation around this house? That I think there's probably not three, two days that go by without us having a random bucket list conversation. We want to be going somewhere. We talk about them as the sort of big black dots on the calendar that sort of pull you through the year. Yes. Because I think we've had those conversations that, you know, what are we doing here? You know, waking up the groundhog nature of most of what we do, that it's these, these places we go these things that we intend on doing that I think kind of pull us through things to look forward to. I'm gonna go with one that I think I've purchased three times. And it's expired three times over our life, that we've never gone down and done. And that's salsa dancing. Oh, yeah. Can we please I mean, I every time I buy it, I have the intention. Intention of doing exactly that. But that would be one where I think it's way out of my comfort zone. Is that your barrier? Is that why we haven't done it yet? There's been other reasons. There's been other reasons. I think, you know, I think the one that comes to mind, I'm trying to think the last time I actually purchased it was was when we had COVID. Right? It was right before COVID. It was we I think we skipped the time we were supposed to do it when the life was when the world was open. But then when we kind of circle back around before it expired, you know, and maybe it hasn't expired. It's downtown Santa Cruz. So it might still be there. But possible, we'll probably be. I think my answer to that one is on a on a casual standpoint that that was something we should do together. And the why. That's the second part of the question why? I think the why circles back to the little bit of the math equations I was using last week, which is my resistance to salsa dancing might be a low level of just small out of the ordinary discomfort. But I don't think it matches the number that might be on your fulfilled scale. And so kind of a refresher is I sort of landed in the middle of a question last week that if the resistance doesn't match the fulfillment, you might want to consider meeting in the middle on that as a as a couple you know, it might be one of those times to do something because one guaranteed we're gonna have a good time doing it. I mean, there's no doubt in my mind that it's no fail. We're gonna have a great time. So I just have to get over that little ledge of being uncomfortable in my own skin for that first moment, right? It's gonna be uncomfortable for us both I'm not a dancer, Drew. Yeah, but it'll be so fun. Alright, so you got to turn the tables in answer your side now. Okay, rephrase the question again so I can remember what something we should do together and why. Okay, so my answer to this is to go to Europe, specifically to the Vatican with brings us back to what you explained last week, you know, the the origin of the title of this podcast, and your experience of making your way to the top and looking at the broken tiles. And you wrote all this in a letter to me, it's why I fell in love with you. And it's really so important to me to actually be there with you and see that with you. That would be amazing. It would have a one, it's incredible to go to, you know, anytime we've traveled together and sort of pushed the boundaries of the United States, it's been unequivocally magical. And so that would be the great part, we have a tiny little story there that predates even us. The story is it existed predated us and then I met you, and it became something more and a fundamental part of our story. And that's the name of this podcast, but we did have makes me think there'll be four COVID, we did have a trip on the docks that I still think has a ton of merit. Once life settles a little bit, we've had a, not only the two years of COVID, but we've had a crazy year personally with some deaths in the family, which not to always push things down the road, but it's not for today. But that's a question. You know, one of the things we can talk about down the road, but that's kept us from the plan was to fly into one way ticket to Charles de Gaulle. And we had 18 days, and a one way ticket out of Leonardo da Vinci in Rome. I think last time we had this discussion, which wasn't too long ago, I called it Leonardo DiCaprio airport. And it was humiliating, it was adorable. But Leonardo da Vinci airport. And I think the plan was to basically land three, four days in Paris, and then kind of make our way on the north top of Belgium, and, you know, and work our way down through Germany and Switzerland and Italy and just kind of not have a reservation and just have, if we're reviving a certain area, we'd stay longer. And if not, we just keep moving. So just make our decisions in the moment. So salsa dancing, and then maybe we land in Spain first. Oh, that'd be because that was an option. I think. I feel like Lisbon. On that side, you could land in Lisbon, and then make your way through Spain, and you have a different path. But you could kind of go through that, that that far farther airport and make your way through some bigger countries and then find your way down. I think I like that better. Because I've always wanted to go to Spain. Yeah. And so that was a good one. And I think it's time for question number two. All right. Are you ready for this one? Yeah, we're moving into closer. Okay. So it's yellow. And the question is, I really like this because this is something we've talked about what is your top love language, and your second and as a refresher, the love languages are words of affirmation, acts of service, quality, time, physical touch, and gifts. This has been a big one. And I think we've talked about this quite a bit. I think we've taken some online tests with the kids and talked about it ourselves over the last few years. I know the one that always jumps out at me. At the very, very top is physical touch, I think physical touches. One has a reputation obviously, within the context of this question. That might be even sexual, but I think you know me well enough to know, it crosses all the boundaries. I'm a I'm a hugger of my friends. I, I feel a connection, you know, through physical touch with people. You know, and I think it's only men manifests itself that that's a thing when you run into a non hugger. You know, I think we we are a family that does hug quite a bit in goes in deep. And it's not always reciprocated. And that's the times when I kind of realized oh, that's my that's my number one love language as this question was presented to me and one of my other choices, quality time, acts of service, words of affirmation, and gifts. So mine would be physical touch in quality time. Those are my top two and I think that's where I always know I say it out loud. I think that's where I always end up landing is that for For a lot of reasons, I think the quality time might have evolved over a period of years out of a need to elevate the quality time in our life because of finances. You know, we mentioned in the first podcast, like a lot of people, but we've had some extreme because of the type of business that I've done more of the entrepreneur kind of mindset owning my own businesses, we've had some really peaks and valleys. And I think we were settled in letting me run after some of those dreams. But it did lead to some true, you know, deep valleys that were difficult financially. And I think what we ended up doing during those times was making sure that quality time was a priority with the kids. And, and we became very good at quality time. And we not only did we become good at quality time, it was more than just spending time together, we made an adventure of it. Right? With whatever resources we had. Yeah, it was actually something that I learned a lot from because you were very creative in those moments. And I had not grown up with that kind of creativity or positivity positive thinking about a challenging situation, not something I knew anything about. So it became fun for everybody. It didn't I think the necessity for finding balance in those times made us a little bit more connoisseurs of quality time. And it really greatly benefited on say long road trips. Like when we were living in New York, the big one every year was to go to Myrtle Beach. And it's a long drive. I honestly can't remember top my head, but I feel like 12 or 13 hours, something something like this. It's a long, it's not it's not like our California to Denver, it's a little shorter than that. But it's a it's a hike. And I think as the kids were kind of at certain ages, as we were doing that I remember at coffee with the guys downtown, the there were stories of what a nightmare that trip is, and as you know, about to tear my kids heads off and things like that. And not that we didn't have those moments. But overall, I think that was family playlists time and new music adventures, and we found different games to play and there was a I think the energy that we put into quality time paid off on some of those those trips, and I think it's still paying off because you know, we'll go visit the kids now. And at the ages, they are they still want to hang out with us. They make an effort to carve the time out to be with us and we have a really good time. Yeah. And it's I think that's one where I would like to talk about that more at some point. As far as transitioning our relationship with our kids, oh, sure. From all the way through, you know, even that one, zero to six, you know, sixth grade seventh, eighth ninth, high school, young adults for adults. It's been one of those ones that I think it's interesting because it's challenging, but it's it's kind of a worthy conversation to have on the road there's lots of challenges and you know, talk about peaks and valleys that's parenting right there. So your love languages my love languages are quality time and acts of service that seems right. Yeah. And you speak my love language will really just about every day the fact that you bring me a cup of coffee as I am in bed that is an act of service that is that to me reflects the fact that you love me it's it's really special to me and I don't think we had this conversation till this came up that I never gave it the any standing other than those making coffee in I'm going to bring it to you. It is one of the things that you know your your want to on on Father's Day or birthday or special times or even question like this to kind of reaffirm how much that means. I think I'm hip to the game now that that's something that was unexpected for the longest time but a big part of how we start each day when we're together is I know we were just apart for 90 days when you were back east with my mom after my dad passed and the outside of all the other things that that were going to happen when you came back when I come to visit the thing you were looking most forward to even when I came back and visit you there was staying in bed and having a cup of coffee brought to you so Yeah, I get it, I get it, and that I would never even I think I put too much weight sometimes in that word when we first broach this subject of acts of service. And I think eventually I might even change my answers include that in a category because I think I put acts of service at too high of a standing as far as what it means. Right? Right. It doesn't have to be some some grand gesture, it can be something very simple. I think it's something we both do for each other without realizing it without thinking about it. But the the coffee is very specific. And it's Yeah, I think I always attributed acts of service to going and working in a soup kitchen. Oh, I see what you're saying, in a different way. But you know what's interesting, Brian, you may not remember the last time we did this assessment, acts of service and quality time or what came up for you it was not physical touch. That can't be I'm telling you, there's no way. There's no way I would never have said physical touch. I can't imagine the planet. It's not something you said. It's something the assessment showed, and you take the test, taking, taking the test, and we talked about it. And I remember being so surprised. I was certain it was going to be that was about that rings a bell. You're right that there was a surprise there. And there's also were surprises on the personality tests. Danya Graham, that what you mean, yep. Yeah. And that also might be one that we circle back around to, and do that test on one of these podcasts that get some interesting results also. Yeah, I think that's a great idea. I was really surprised by my results. I'm still kind of shocked by them. Right, actually. So yeah, that's a good one. So before, I think it's time for our big news, okay, but if we want to do that one, but I also think that before we kick them to the curb, I want to make sure we give space to our original title sponsor, of course, to wheel everything to after one episode and the eight listeners that follow us on Apple podcasts. Now, what you can do, you can go to Apple podcasts, and eight. It's a big number. I'm actually surprised by that that led to the incredible opportunity. We'll talk to you about it. But before we move on to the next I want to give honor to our original title sponsor, and that's going to be of course, Panamera lions, who, again, like I said, if not for them, who are we right now. Welcome aboard. Welcome aboard the spacious cabin, attractively decorated, air conditioned, but draft bring newly designed individual overhead light units or an innovation. roominess extends even to the powder rooms, which looked like those in a private home. And a new sensation, complete absence of vibration. That's big for me. Absence of vibration in my flight is something that predates me but I do appreciate it. One of the most stunning discoveries in flight was not feeling of movement at all. There's a video to give this hardly makes me inquire new, transportation jealous, has been taken out of travel, the people that have traveled before us back in this time, we're looking at video from this television commercial from the 1950s. From our sponsor, and there is glassware, there are people sitting at four top tables on the plane dressed up nicely dressed to the nines, as they used to say, and it was an event, it was an event. And I actually remember less Yeah, I remember that actually, as a kid how dressed up we had to get to get on a plane to go to from San Francisco to LAX for Disneyland trips. And it wasn't just shorts and a T shirt. It was it was a huge event that you had to you had to look like you belonged there. I also remember not always sitting with my family because of the nature of the way they got the tickets. And sometimes my mom and dad would be in a seat by the window. My older brother Todd and I would be separated sometimes close to them but one or two rows away. And more than once we went down there enough times that there was more than one time where I was between two people changed smoking the entire flight. Oh, absolutely away and it boggles my mind that I'm a seven year old reading my comic books in between two people that did not stop smoking the entire flight. It's so funny what used to be okay. What we didn't know then. Unreal. Yeah. Unreal. And so with the ashtrays in between on the handle of each chair in between, it's still exist in some of them. I know some old planes you get on and you see the old last trade out there and it's it's a throwback. So while it's a crime, yeah, it now it's a crime. So why don't you go ahead and break the Big news. Big news. I'm so excited about it coming back to intelligent change. So they have agreed to be our sponsor. Yeah, it was exciting. It was a fairly aggressive ask after one episode with no listeners. But we were able to hook up, I sent an email out to the company, telling them what we were doing the game that we were playing on our podcast, and it seemed like a natural fit for partnership of some kind. And Patricia from intelligent change has been amazing. She went back and forth with us the whole week, and we negotiated a small little deal that's we'll grow as the podcast goes, but possibly right out the gate, we get a little promotion, quote, promotional promotional code that gives them 10% off of all their purchases. And we're also gonna be able to give away one free game for every podcast. Yeah, so them meaning our listeners, if you're interested in any of the products from intelligent change, the code is broken tiles 10, you can put that in the promo code spot when you order at intelligent change.com. And of course, we've talked about this game, but they have amazing products. One product I especially love called The Five Minute Journal that I bought, I was trying to figure out how long ago it was, it's probably around seven years ago. Fantastic journal. It's a gratitude journal, and it gives you it's, I guess you'd call it a guided gratitude journal. And what I really loved about it is the beginning of the book talks quite a bit about all of the evidence based research around behavior change and how to how you can make this a regular practice and supporting your, your well being I guess, is probably the best way to put it. And intelligent change they their focuses on creating products that help you realize your potential and, you know, support you in leading a happier, happier existence. In general, they have several more products, and we'll, we'll share those in various episodes. But I certainly encourage you to, to go to intelligent change.com And I listened to a lot of podcasts to hear how the commercials go. And I think it's one that's very easy for us to get on board with one because we're playing the game and two, I think from Stacey standpoint, in particular, many of their other products organically you're already using and you have been used and recommend in some of your classes and things that you do. So it's a it's a good partnership. And we're super excited. We're no we're worthy of it right now. But I think it gives us a carrot to go after as we build this and it's really nice to have them in our corner particularly to promote the game. And the way we'll handle the game giveaway is going to be super organic Honor Code easy. Is that all you need to do is go to the Apple podcast download the episode like the channel and follow us and share it with three friends. That's it and they don't need to listen to it they don't like it but once you do those things, just emails that you did that at Brian at Brian at broken tiles podcast sorry I completely skipped that you did it's very it's much simpler than that it's broken tiles podcast at Gmail gmail.com No, no at Brian in there. You killed your part I destroyed my one little bit I was supposed to. So all you just follow it like it share it with a few people broken tiles podcast@gmail.com Just let us know you did it your information. And then we'll give you a new code to use at intelligent change.com To get your free game. Exactly. And I'll just share one more thing about this organization. Another thing that just it makes me so excited because I love what they're all about their logo is a triangle with looks like rays coming out all around it. Yeah. And it's meant to be like to represent Maslow's hierarchy of needs, which is depicted as a triangle with our most important or foundational needs on the bottom and coming up to the top where we where we reach our our highest gosh, I can't remember what the exact word is where we we become self actualized that's what it is well, and so all the way Yeah, so I just I'm really, I guess nerdy in that way I get excited about some theories and and research that I've come across over the years. And that just tells me that they really have a an objective of goal in mind of supporting people in in maybe eventually becoming self actualized. Amazing. I think it's great. Yeah. Yes. Go. All right. So this is, what do you think? Are my top five values in life? And then we'll talk about whether they're accurate or not. Wow, what level is this? This is the closest This is the highest level. Value values. Values are different than morals. Yeah, um, they could be interrelated. But what do you value? Like, what do you what I am you? I'm guessing you're Stacy and I'm looking out in the world and thinking, what do I value the most? You value? Now can this be places things people can be is it doesn't have to be as are we choosing from categories? I struggle a little bit king of core values is the way I'm thinking about this. So for me, well, I don't want to tell you our values. I think I know that. What drives me, what, what, what drives the decisions I make? And the things that I do? The people that I talk to in my everyday life? Family, but that's not a value? Sure. It is, it is yes. Oh, that's a guess that was getting out. It's like these whole concepts of things. Because for me, almost to a point of view, and I have a little contention, sometimes over it, I think family is would be your number one, as far as your this is you waking up in the day, and what what value, what values that kind of push you a little bit you value. Your health, you have a tremendous amount of value in your, your health, you know, as far as the things that you'll do, the food that you'll eat, it's a all encompassing part of your day. So family, your your, your mental and physical health. Yes, I think is a one that I see you starting the day with your journaling, your meditations, your yoga, you're trying to be mindful, you use that word mindfulness a lot. And that's part of who you are. 55 of these Yeah, that's a lot like I can get there. It's just a matter of, you know, the so they'll get the family I've got the health and mental fitness, I think, for you, you value. Challenges. You're very much challenges slash goals are. For you, I think it's a an incredible, you know, part of your DNA is finding ambitious goals and challenges to overcome or to set off and accomplish. You value loyalty. I think you have a tremendous amount of value put into not people that are loyal to you, but that are loyal to us, like loyal to us in that way where you have the small circle of people that you could probably say, That's my loyal group of family. That's my loyal group of friends. And so I see that as not something that you asked for. It's not something that you demand. But I think it's loyalty sometimes gets a negative connotation. And really, it's it's the, in its simplest form. It's an incredible level to achieve with somebody that you're close to is to say that you're loyal to somebody else without being beat over your head. Yeah, I think it's one of those ones that I would see in that category. Your core values thank you for I think you've done for you said family, mental and physical health. Do you want to count those as two? Well, you can start if you can get on the path, and I'll try to come up with a legit fifth. Are you ready? start answering yours. I think so, about what my values are? No, I think you need to Yeah, I guess we'll do the first part first, like how far okay, I feel like that was clearly difficult. That was yeah, it felt like I was pretty far off. I actually, I think you were really spot on with a lot of those. Although I, I don't think I've ever considered loyalty. But the way you described it, that does seem to fit. One other thing that came to my mind that it's, this is an interesting exercise. Have you ever sat down and thought about what your core values are before? No, I talked about it in my groups, but I haven't sat down and truly defined exactly what mine are. So one thing that popped into my head is empowerment. And it's me figuring out how to empower myself to move through a challenging situation, okay. But it's also supporting others so that they are empowered to move through a situation. All right. I think that's the only one I would add to what you came up with, it would actually be one down the road, to look at a list and see if we missed any obvious ones. But I think it leans towards why these are so great, because I think you just asked me a question that no one's ever asked me. Yeah. And that's the beauty of doing these little interactions like this is that we, every once in a while, it's staggered, because we don't know what questions coming in. It was just asked a question I've never been asked about you. Right? So flip the tables now. What are my five your five? open mindedness? How do I put this into words, it's very important to you to learn about a lot of different things so that you have it as an objective opinion, opinion as you possibly can. I don't know how to put that into one value. No, but I would agree with you. I agree with the direction you're taking that So so far, your one for one. Okay. I would also say family in a different to a different degree than me in a different way than me. And see, your ability to? Well, control is the word that comes to my mind and I don't mean control in a negative way, I guess maybe mastery of of what it is whatever it is that you put your mind to, you will for instance with with the the magazine, and the different things that are springing from the magazine, you are trying to become very skilled in that everything that you need to do around that. And so you have a love of learning new things. That would be too so I think that's different right now. Because yeah, you're right. Yeah, I think that that's again down the right path. So how many are we at right now? I said family I said the learning to become objective. Mastery. Did I miss something? I think there was something else but I'm not remembering now. I can't remember. Um your time to decompress or relax is very important to you. Yes. And connection with other people. You connect with people on the deepest level of anybody I've ever known. You enjoy that? Yeah, you do. There's no doubt I think it's whether it's a happenstance at a coffee house or on an airplane or we're downtown talking to a guy playing a piano Yes, we did the other day. You don't know where that's gonna lead but that lead to relationship you know, I'm talking to that dude. And he's texting me and we're gonna have coffee again. And I think those are the, the you know monka through a podcast without a sports analogy, but I think I love human interaction. And so you hit a lot of singles, you know, in the baseball reference would be just consistently hitting singles. And every once in a while, you really get a hold of one and you hit it out and you form a meaningful, sometimes lifetime connection with people. But I really am a fan of like extending the opportunity to be more than superficial in passing with people. Because why not? And oh, absolutely, actually, I think that's become an important thing for me is to to have a deeper connection with people the superficial doesn't interest me at all. Right. But I think I learned that from you. I would never have broached that. I give also a massive amount of credit to time. Education. Absolutely. The the growing of confidence because of all your your ability to be in front of people and kind of jump in to that change dramatically when you kind of untraditionally went back to school at 40. I think we mentioned and I think it opened a lot of doors for you in your on the the kind of euphoric first stage of really kicking those doors down with not only from a business standpoint, but with just random, you know, randomly kind of like challenging that part of it. Right? Well, here's, here's a fun little list I pulled up to make sure we're not getting off track. Well, not not even off track, we are off track, we're officially way off track, but the loyalty, spirituality, humility, compassion, these are just values listed. honesty, kindness, integrity, selflessness. And I think we're helping out anybody that might listen to this to kind of qualify when they ask the integrity, I think is something that you described in many, many words. When you were talking, I think you were talking about, I can't remember now about my values or your value about my values. But you, you were talking and describing what integrity was without saying integrity, I can see that. I think there would be no doubt that that's something that I would try to get at. Get through some more. So selflessness, determination, generosity, courage, tolerance, trustworthiness. Yeah. equanimity. And striving for that one. It's that's hard altruism, appreciation, empathy, toughness, self reliance. attentiveness. So it was nice list. It really is a nice list, you know, as far as you know, to develop it. But I think what I like most about that is getting hit with a question that I've never been hit with before. And it was awkward and stumbling. And yeah, now it's something that I'll be thinking about, because I don't like getting caught. Of all people. You know, me, I hate getting caught without an answer. Yes, it's very true. It's also sort of, it's also good to be stumped every once in a while. And have to realize, oh, this is an area. I have some learning to do. Right? What do you enjoy doing? So I do, and I think this format helps me get there even a little bit more. Here we go. I told you, you did not know when it was going to come. And here it is. This was a great time a month ago, right? Yes, it was, it was a blast. I go with what the Norwegian press always pushes is that Aha, is one of the greatest unknown live bands on the planet in now. I fell into them. Like a lot of other people in at one. One hit sort of wonder but then I was that one that kept buying the albums and they've put out 21 studio albums. Is that how many it is? Yeah, and the thing about them is they've never stopped touring. And there they are a little bit more of a rock and roll band in person than the so much energy and take on me and that one from them. They were 18 or 19 years old when they sang that song. So that was a that was and they are amazing live. Right? You wouldn't imagine that his voice could still be that good in a live venue at the age that he's at now as well. He's clearly taken very good care of his voice. It's impressive. I think when we say he was 62 or something like that, but I think we found that quite a bit of the time. You know, when we are looking conscious to go to where an artist surprises you in person. Yes, you know that they're much more rock and roll in person than the produced who else comes to mind fair that fits that Recently, recently, I think would be LISI. Yes, I knew that's what you would say. That was a surprisingly, it was a great time, it was so much more energetic than I had expected it to be. I thought it was going to be her up on a stage with a guitar, like we were in a coffee house. And it was not right was awesome. It was a sweaty, kind of mess. And she doesn't give a shit about what she's wearing or how she's looking on the stage. And it's just so endearing because she's just rocking it. Yeah. And I was shocked because her albums are very produced. Yes, you know, and so I think we were a little bit shocked when we went there. Yeah, so what are we doing now? Are we playing our game playing the game? Excellent. I think we're over one let's keep track of we'll keep track of let me turn it down a little bit. So we don't do the same mistake as last time. What's the number am I choosing the number one between one and 15? Pick a number of 10 Seven Okay, and the key thing here is that let's try not to talk through two songs this time let's get our guesses out because last time we That's right the whole we really struggled last year like I said we're all for one we need to get this one to get one we're just like the Golden State Warriors. We got you're comparing us to the Golden State Warriors. It's exactly like the Golden State Warriors. The Golden State Warriors got trounced in game one they want to differ they were oh and want to get to Boston Celtics humiliated okay maybe in this one area we could we could be compared to them. No other we played this game and we were humiliated last week. Our own children we don't know our children humiliated cannulated if we don't get this 11111 was the number seven I gotta do this so I can't see there. Hold on. 123467 Turn it over. Turn it up Oh shit I have two candidates. I have one do not have me included. So it probably is you. It feels like one of my deep radio mixes from like Agnes. Oh, well. It's a category but then the other one. Obviously, intensely. That's who I so it's two weeks in a row. We guess Ainsley This one's not going to be two people. This will just be one person. I don't think there's two people on this list. I like it. Finally gets my finalising. It's probably you I'm gonna give all my listen because these ones come in to ones I favorited on radios I listened to. I'm going with myself. You I've changed my mind. You did you. Both guesses are Brian. He thinks you'd know your own show. This would be an embarrassing Oh into I think I'm in trouble. From a musical. Oh, of course. It seems like that from the musical waitress the soft place to land. This week. It's Ainsley. It's Ainsley. And we are. Oh until, darn it. Can we do one more? Or only one? One check. It really diminishes. All right, the whole concept of it. And then we're just using now it's like now you're actually like you're in Las Vegas. And let's go the ATM one more time. We do not need to do that. We just have to cut it and cut our bait and say we're going to and well we haven't seen waitress. That's that's where we've lost out one musical we haven't seen. It's a tricky game we're playing because this thing is expansive. And it expands everyone. You put a little green heart next to it. And the fact really Yeah, and so I think it's a candidate not everyone but a candidate to get into the mix. Okay. I think this is a wrap on Episode Two. I don't know if there's any. I got to think about what we're going to title. This one is usually on the Edit and the listen back where the title will magically come to us. I can't think of anything. Maybe it'll be called Leonardo DiCaprio airport. It could be okay, that was fun. Sounds good, but we love you